🎯 Identity Preview
Read time: 3.9 minutes
Welcome to Better at Life, the weekly newsletter where I share one simple, actionable idea you can put into practice today to build better habits, sharpen your mindset, and live with more intention.
I caught myself hesitating before sending a message this week.
It wasn’t a hard decision.
Just unfamiliar.
It required me to be a little more direct than usual.
A little more decisive.
I rewrote the message twice.
Softened the language.
Added extra context I didn’t need.
Then I paused.
Because the hesitation wasn’t about the message.
It was about the version of me sending it.
We don’t just avoid hard things.
We avoid unfamiliar identities.
Acting like a leader.
Speaking with clarity.
Taking ownership.
Even when we know what to do, it can feel slightly out of character.
So we delay.
Or we shrink it back to something more comfortable.
That’s when I started thinking about this idea.
I call it Identity Preview.
Instead of waiting to “become” that version of yourself, you try it on in small moments.
You preview it.
Before it feels natural.
Write this down:
You don’t become first, then act. You act, then become.
This Week’s Action
Pick one identity you are growing into.
Not a title.
A way of showing up.
Examples:
- a clear communicator
- a focused operator
- a calm leader
- someone who follows through
Then ask:
What would this version of me do today?
Look for one small moment to act accordingly.
Send the direct message.
Make the decision faster.
Speak up in the meeting.
Finish the task fully.
Keep it small.
This is a preview, not a transformation.
Why This Works
Most people think identity change is a result.
It’s not.
It’s a repetition.
You build identity the same way you build habits.
Through small, consistent actions.
Identity Preview lowers the barrier.
You are not trying to permanently change who you are.
You are just stepping into it briefly.
That makes it easier to start.
And once you act differently a few times, it stops feeling unfamiliar.
Try This
Use Identity Preview once per day this week.
In a moment that matters, pause and ask:
What would the next version of me do here?
Then do that.
Even if it feels slightly unnatural.
Especially if it does.
You’re not faking it.
You’re practicing it.
Weekly Reflection
Before you move on from this email, pause for a moment.
Ask yourself:
What identity am I growing into right now?
Where did I hesitate this week?
What would that version of me have done instead?
Write it down.
Then try it once tomorrow.
If this idea feels useful, feel free to pass it along to someone who might need it this week.
You don’t have to wait to become someone new.
You can start showing up that way today.
See you next week — a little better at life.
______
Dr. Chris Mullen
Bring Better at Life to Your Organization
If these ideas resonate, this is also the work I bring into organizations and leadership teams.
I partner with organizations that want clearer thinking, stronger decision-making, and more sustainable performance.
Engagements typically include:
- Keynote speaking for conferences and leadership events
- Leadership development workshops for teams and managers
- Team strategy sessions focused on alignment and execution
For senior leaders seeking deeper application, I also maintain a small executive coaching practice.
